were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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