remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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