And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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