Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
