ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
try to milk me bitch
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