I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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