I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
