Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You are the jesus of drinking
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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