I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
