So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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