I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
