i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Randomize
