Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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