Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
