so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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