I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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