I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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