and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
