i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
