I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize