my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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