There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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