Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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