I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
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