How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
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