I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
