Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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