Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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