How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
