Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
