Plan B is the new Plan A
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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