He asked me if I "almost moaned"
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
