He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
