David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
