Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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