i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
its not stalking. its research.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
