I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
