My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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