If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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