i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
