dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
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