From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize