I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
