? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
