After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
I'm really busy with my period
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