I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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