Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Randomize
