okay pat passed out under dana's car
I think I died a long time ago.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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