i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
