def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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