Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
