i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
